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The smell is here was straight up sex, and like I said with the sheets earlier, drenched, there was no way I could cover this up.“Randy what are you ... haha are you beating off in there? You are aren’t you!”“No I’m not beating off in here, that’s fucking weird to do that in your room,” I responded.“Then what are you doing? What did you lock the door for?” Chris laughed.I covered Rita up in the driest part of the sheets I could find and grabbed one of his extra towels from the closet, wrapped it around me and opened the door. “That’s why.”I moved outta the way and let him see Rita covered up on the bed post-orgasm, and he went from cracking jokes to giving me props in seconds.“Finally! And she got you out of that funky mood you were in, it’s about damn time!”“Well her not being here was the reason for my funky mood soo...”“Just one question though, why my room? Steph’s room is one door away from the stairs.”“I don’t know man, you room just got picked that’s all. Consider it an. I don’t need anger management. I need people to stop irritating me!When I was a child I thought Nap Time was a punishment ... Now, as a grown up, it just feels like a small vacation...My people skills are just fine. It’s my tolerance of idiots that needs working on.If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would’ve put them on my knees.The kids text me “plz” which is shorter than please. I text back “no” which is shorter than “yes.”I’m going to retire and live off of my savings. Not sure what I’ll do the second week.Even duct tape can’t fix stupid ... but it can muffle the sound!Why do I have to press one for English when you’re just gonna transfer me to someone I can’t understand anyway?Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.This item is compliments of an Anonymous donor:A man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs.Three women, an American, a Kiwi and a Australian Woman, were walking past and felt sorry for the poor man.The American woman.
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